Another day, Another Life Plan

So today, I picked up the pace and was not distracted. I didn't glance back once. They were there, but no longer have the lure.
It was the reflections of the waves draining back into the sand that made it so pleasurable today. The light was beautiful and cast many different shades of purple into the sand. Wettest being deeper, with reflections of the blue,above and white foam bubbles being chased back to sea only to be run over by more on their way inland. There were perfect little balls of water seemingly floating on top of the sand, ready to melt or give way to any whim, breeze or touch. It was the constant swirl of color that I appreciated today. Of course I've seen it daily, but today it stood out so clear. It was the color of skin in my new painting. Purples, blues, oranges and pink.
Cowgirl in the sand...Purple words on a gray background, to be a Woman an to be turned down.
So, I have come to a new life plan. I feel that if I have only 20 good years left, I'm not going down easily. I will not wait for the opportunity, but will create it. My life has been a safe life, always safe.
Marriage, motherhood, my job, my art. Why did I list it in that order? Always on the brink of taking a risk, yet stepping back just in time ...to be safe. Is that how I want to live to the end? It's not who I used to be, so what has happened to me? Responsibility can only take so much blame. It's time to expand my universe while I still can. I need more. Can I leave my family behind? Yes, I have new reason, but I need the push.
First step, learn Spanish and Italian. Next, I think a villa in Tuscany for a month with my sabadical money next year. I need to travel, paint , to see new light. To live.